Focusing Power...
Recently a number of things came together for me as a result of my latest attempts to overcome performance anxiety...
- I participated in a challenge to improve a single discrete skill. This involved practicing that specific skill every day for a month and recording it weekly.
- I made myself 'perform' for others several times a week, including in person to my teacher and a friend, online by Skype/Zoom, in 2 guitar circles, and at an open mic.
- I got expert advice on performing from my teacher - most notably by practicing pieces unbelievably slowly to activate different types of memory.
- I read a number of articles on ways to address performance anxiety - the piece of advice that most resonated (particularly now I am getting some experience performing) was to change expectations. I had always considered that the only acceptable performance was one where I played to the best of my ability - any mistake would set me on a downward spiral to disaster. The article pointed out that this was unrealistic - particularly at the beginning. The goal instead should be to recover from mistakes and keep playing! The other thing it said was to develop a mistake recovery plan and practice it (deep and steady breathing was suggested).
Why am I listing these things? because it reminded me of something my guitar teacher said when I grumbled to him about falling apart when trying to play for others. (Honestly I don't need to tell him this - he experiences it on a regular basis in lessons!) Getting back to the point, he asked me whether I had made addressing this deficit my specific focus. And now I think I understand. It's not something you work on occasionally. It's something you address systematically and often over a period of time in multiple different ways, continually analyzing and applying the results forward. And this article talks about focusing on a process rather than a goal - interesting.
Have I conquered performance anxiety? Of course not. However I am more often than not managing to play through mistakes and keep going. (Hopefully this will eventually translate into better performances).
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